Thursday, December 11, 2008

Thoughts Are Things


The difference between living and non living things is intake and output. Non living things, like rocks, for example, don't do anything. They don't create anything. They don't take anything in or put anything out. But living things, even ones that don't do much moving around, all share the trait of taking in and putting out.

At the body level every living thing has to eat and everything that eats has to excrete. But bodily functions are only the first level of this, it goes way beyond that. The body of any living thing also represents a species, and all the species of nature perform a function. They're born with "jobs". In the normal course of doing their jobs they will take something in and put something out. When they mature it's not just about reproduction, it's about becoming able to do what they do "for a living". That is the fulfillment of their purpose.

Every species on the planet, every living thing, has a job it does simply by existing. It is effortless for them, they can't help but do their jobs because their work is who and what they are. It's also true that the lives of very different species intersect for mutual benefit. In the great harmonious cacophony of life out there, there is no waste. What one species puts out another species takes in. They all help to keep each other alive by providing food, homes, and relationships of mutual benefit from teeth cleaning to home security. Nobody gets screwed and nobody collects obscene profits that starve out everyone else. It's all meant to chug along in perfect balance with everyone getting what they need by helping someone else get what they need, whether they realize it or not. When something happens to upset the balance, that's when problems arise. The same thing is true with our own species.

In nature nothing is pointless or superfluous, even if we smarty pants humans can't at first glance see any purpose or function to some life forms. Trees, for example, do their jobs by being the kinds of trees they are. They get their needs met by drawing nutrition and water from the soil and energy from the sun, and by taking in carbon dioxide and putting out oxygen, the exact opposite of how and what we breathe and exhale. Just the act of being what they are and doing what they do provides benefit to others. Trees create oxygen for everything to breathe, helping all the living things on this world sustain their lives. I'd call that a contribution. Oh yeah, and they make food too. Definite contributors those trees.

By being themselves and doing whatever they do simply by existing, trees, and all other species, live fulfilling lives. They take in what sustains them, and put out something that serves another species or they do something that serves another species. We need to notice that pattern. For some reason we don't seem to have grasped it yet. We're also a self destructive mess. Hello? Does anyone want to buy a clue?

Having innate purpose and function seems to be true for all species, with the exception of one. Us. Humans. We are able to choose our functions in this world and are not supposedly born with a function inherent in our being, at least it may seem that way. It's something to ponder, because there's a lot there to ponder on. Not the least of which is noticing that all other species do jobs that benefit others in the system. There aren't too many living things that exist to kill everything for no reason, or to scorch the earth, or to pollute it or destroy it or waste its resources. Only humans and viruses do those things. But those things are not our true functions, they're just really bad choices. If this is a test, we're failing it.

How can every species but ours have innate purpose and function? That doesn't mesh with the reality around us. We must have innate purpose and function too. We are living things, so we have to take in and put out something of benefit. What do humans put out by simple virtue of their existence that's of any use or value in this world?

It seems to me the single thing that separates humans from other species is the way we think. The way we think determines pretty much everything about us, at the personal level and at the levels we interact and function in the outside world. What we think ends up being what we do to this world and each other. We can conceive of things without boundaries or limits of any kind. Then with the handy use of our opposable thumbs we can create all manner of swell contributions. What humans put out is thought. That is what we create by nature of our being. It is our product. When it's done right it's a contribution. When it's not, things go very wrong.

The quality of our thoughts is a great deal more important than we've realized. It is important to our overall health. It affects the quality of our lives. If we have consistently poor thought quality we'll live consistently poor quality lives. It's pretty simple when you stop to think about it. It's self evident. The way we think, what and how we think, even when we think, affects how we feel, what we do and how and when we do it. It affects pretty much everything about us. Our thoughts determine our lives.

I've always heard that thoughts are things, but I never took it in the literal sense. Thoughts have no physical dimensions that we are aware of. We can't see them or touch them, whether they're ours or whether they're in other people's heads. But we know thoughts exist in our own heads and in most other people's heads, the quality of those thoughts not withstanding.

Thinking is an activity but it is not a thought. A thought is a thing. A thought is output, a creation, a product of the mind. It's an invisible thing we make with our invisible minds. The mind is not a physical object but even so, it does take in and put out, like every other living thing takes in and puts out. What it puts out is mind product, which means that thoughts must have substance, of some kind.

How can it be that an invisible thing like a thought could have direct physical impact on our bodies, unless it has some kind of substance? It doesn't make sense to us that a "non-thing", an idea, a thought, an emotion, any of the products of the mind, could have any physical affect on us at all. But we know these things do affect us and can have profound physical effects on our bodies.

We can also be very much affected by the thoughts, feelings and the states of mind of other people. We are able to physically sense "energy" sometimes, as soon as we enter a room. We call it energy, but what does that mean? Energy is a generic term, a catch all word like "stuff". It could mean so many things that it doesn't mean anything. That energy we are able to pick up is not non specific. It's quite specific. We are picking up on other people's thoughts and feelings.

The general feeling at a funeral is quite tangible, and so is the feeling you can get walking into a great cathedral. The feeling at a high school dance is distinct and so is the feeling of walking into a library or a ballpark. Even when these places are empty the thought energy lingers in abundance. It's not just the level of physical activity or lack of activity that we tangibly pick up on or sense, we feel the thought and emotional energy that's been produced by others.

We effortlessly and correctly pick up on the collective thought output of other people, and the more people are thinking and feeling the same way, the stronger it is. Some of us are more capable than others at picking it up, but it's hardly a rare experience. When people aren't at all good at picking up the mental energy of others, it's commonly said they're insensitive. What a perfect word for it. And for people who are quite good at sensing mental energy, we say they're sensitive and it's a compliment. It's a good and natural thing to be able to do this and we expect each other to do it. It can't be a common expectation and yet be impossible to do.

But how can our physical senses pick up on these things? Could it be that thoughts are really things? Do they have substance? Maybe they do. The substance they are may be substance in a sense we don't have a concept for yet. There are different kinds of physical, substantive qualities, like sound for instance. Sound has physical qualities, it has substance. Deaf people are able to receive some sounds through the physical feel of sound on their bodies. They can correctly interpret that feeling to be sound, even though they can't hear it. A single musical note has sound substance. It would be fair to call a musical tone an object. It's just not an object in a sense we usually think of.

We're given to think that objects can only be solid and three dimensional when there are all kinds of physical realities that don't fit that description. Sound waves, light waves, heat waves, these all have something we can tangibly receive and interpret, effortlessly, and in great detail. Where deaf people can only sense the physical impact of sound on their bodies, hearing people can fully receive the sound objects because they have more physical properties than body impact and we can receive the full spectrum with our sound object receivers.

If sound is a different kind of object then perhaps thoughts are objects of a different kind too. We don't hear thoughts because they aren't sound objects. They are thought objects. Things that can be received by thought object receivers. Just because we can't see our thought object receivers doesn't mean they aren't there. We can't see our minds either but they're there. We obviously have the ability to receive thought objects through natural processes inherent within the mind. Everyone has thought object receivers, it's just that a whole lot of people seem to have them all but shut off. It's a bit like being deaf by choice.

It is a choice, and it's more than likely based on people being told that there is no such thing. When you don't think there is any such thing then you ignore it. When signals get through anyway you tell yourself you're crazy and you don't want anyone else finding out about it. You deny it to yourself and to everyone else. Well guess what. These things exist and they're normal. And it makes perfect sense. What good is creating and putting out thought objects if they can't be received by other minds? It is more reasonable to believe they can be received than not.

It's probably true that everyone is born with functional thought object receivers. We have them and we receive through them, whether we want to believe it or not, and whether we're aware of it or not. It's effortless to receive thought object signals, and they are broadcast all around us all the time. We sometimes become conscious of receiving these signals and pay attention to them, and sometimes we don't know what they are and shrug them off. Regardless of what we do with them they are there.

If thoughts are our inherent product then we should be able to take them in and put them out and we should be able to do this effortlessly because it's what we do. If we are aware of this natural ability, we absolutely can use it and master it, just like we have to discover and master our own hands. Through using it we can perfect using it and can fine tune our receivers and be able to know for a fact that they're working as expected and that we're benefiting from their use. What we operate with now compared to what we could operate with at full ability might be like the difference between a deaf person sensing physical sound waves and actually being able to hear them.

Our denied thought object receivers still consistently pick up the bluntest thought objects, the big ones that get through in spite of our belief that things like that just don't exist. If we set our receivers to full open spectrum and learn how to use them, we could pick up quite a lot of information about each other. Because we are consistently told that this is not reality, it is not a real thing that we can do, that it's a foolish nonsensical idea, we don't pay it any mind. We don't respect it. We deny our own direct experience and tell ourselves it can't mean anything. We are missing out on a natural and real part of ourselves, a powerful part, by refusing to let ourselves believe the truth instead of somebody else's messed up dogma. It's like having an arm and not using it because no one believes in arms. Everyone has arms but still, they do not believe in them.

Why is there such strong negative brainwashing here? Why is it SO taboo and why are you SO ridiculous if you say you can pick up energy, feelings, or even information through senses that have been reported since there were people? Why should officialdom care? If it's really not there then why should they care one way or the other about it? Why should they be so strongly invested in their negative position?

The mind is invisible and intangible, a complete mystery. We know little about it, which makes ironic sense considering it is our defining aspect. Why should we know anything about our defining function? Why would science and the powers that be, want us to have a really good grasp of the mind and to understand it as much as we can? How would it serve them if we all understood that it is our human job to use our minds to receive and output thoughts? That using our minds is the very nature of who we are. Thinking in all kinds of ways is what we do, it is being ourselves. Using our minds brings us happiness and fulfillment to say nothing of making our lives better. It wouldn't serve the controllers at all, it would serve and empower us. It would bring us together and make it all but impossible to dick with us and keep us afraid of boogie men. And if that happened we would no longer respond to slavery cues, which have taken centuries to ingrain into larger populations so that they'll consider it natural to have their minds and their lives limited and restricted, bound by beliefs of all kinds true or false, with most of everything off limits to them.

How else could we live in a culture that thinks being dumb is somehow cool? Where else did we get that idea if not from our dear loving controllers, propagated through our TV sets and pop culture? We also get them from our well meaning parents who cannot think past the culture product they bought from the controllers pushy propaganda marketers, and we hand this down from generation to generation. If we understood that everything we are and everything our species could ever be, depended on the intake and output of our minds, perhaps we would hold our brains and our minds and ourselves in much higher regard. Maybe we'd have much more belief in ourselves and our abilities. Perhaps we'd take care of our minds and nourish them with worthwhile input so that we could create worthwhile output and live worthwhile lives. It would feel great to spend a lifetime taking in high quality input for our minds and in turn putting out even higher quality output from them. It's the nature of our beings and because it is, it would be pleasurable as heck to be doing it as well as it could be done. Making a real contribution can only come from our minds, that's where it must start. It would be a truly rewarding experience for us, something that in this culture and society is horribly lacking.

We rarely take away a feeling of reward from our work, because largely speaking, the work we do is not of any direct benefit to us, or to anyone else for that matter. That's totally against nature. Using our minds to benefit ourselves while benefiting others is the ultimate fulfillment, it's what we're meant to do. But what we call work is generally not at all creative. In fact, it's often mind numbing and dull. It's repetitive and constricting and it's always confined to one small area from which we are not allowed to stray or evolve the work into a logical improvement. There's not much in it for humanity to spend our most productive time of life simply performing rote functions for the benefit of whoever it is that hires us. Because it is they who benefit. That benefit is the very reason they hire us, to reward themselves with material wealth. Not any other kind of wealth, just material wealth. Is it any wonder why we're in so much trouble as a species?

We're off track, or on the wrong track, or trying desperately to find a track. The human species is going in all of the wrong directions and is causing so much destruction and waste in the process. And why? Because we're not living our truth. We're not developing our talents and using them with all the joy that brings. We're not consciously creating a better world where all are served and are able to be joyfully productive in a way that expresses their true nature. We've been sucked in to the dominant but erroneous thought objects of others who believe that the only thing that matters is getting rich and being powerful. We're all manipulated into and stuck in somebody else's truly bad idea. Hell yes thoughts are things. They can be brilliant and wonderful things but they can also be dangerous prisons that we keep ourselves in, not knowing we can leave them anytime.

We spend our whole lives performing meaningless functions within other people's dominating forced paradigm of turning the world into a continuously paying off slot machine for themselves, and we're just the parts, and the levers, but we are never rewarded this way. It's killing us, separating us from our purpose and meaning, and causing mindless destruction and waste. It's a truly messed up, insulting way of living and thinking and of perceiving the planet and everything on it, including us.

Speaking of insulting, what does TV do to the mind? Overloading our receivers with addictive insipid schlock is like being lost in drug addiction. The result is the same. Your life goes by without you living it. You can stay wasted on booze or drugs, or on TV and propaganda and advertising, until the day you die. You'll never achieve your true potential or even know what it was. You were talked out of wanting it, out of looking for it, out of demanding the right to live it, convinced your only real potential was being a slave with a bowl of gruel for a brain. In the end, you've never lived your life, you just don't know it. They know it. They just don't want you to know.

That would definitely serve the controllers. No competition from the rabble that way. No one else's infinitely better thoughts to rule the day and eject these losers from our lives and end their inane, pointless control of our world. No wonder they've got a lock down on the major media and the news and the magazines and the entertainment industry. No wonder every last bit of it exists only to sell you things. They want your money. This whole world is based on the fact that some psychopathic obsessive compulsive morons want your money. Playing the game makes you their slave. This is their whole vision. It has no substance and no point beyond getting their little itty bitty rocks off. There's nothing in it for anyone else but themselves. They're against nature, against truth, against doing anything except for the most selfish motivations. They are perfectly happy to gain by depriving others of everything they need to survive. They're an offense and an outrage who don't deserve to be tolerated, much less be in charge.

This is no small thing. It's the most profound and vile rip off of all time. They are stealing who we really are and what this world could really be.

They can't physically rip off the whole planet, it's not possible. The only way they can perpetrate the obscenity of their retarded existence is by getting into our heads and getting us to take in their thought objects. Not only take them in, but to elevate them to such exaulted status, as though those thought objects were godlike and to be worshiped, that we deny our own thought objects and make theirs our true purpose in life instead. It's not possible to live somebody else's thought objects without becoming nothing more than extensions of their will. That's why we're built to create our own and use our own and in that way find and be who we really are.

We have the ability to see through these people and to know who they are. They don't want us to believe that it's inherent within us, a part of us, the ability to absolutely sense the truth about others. Because that is the one thing that cannot be lied about. It cannot be manipulated. It is pure and it is reality. It cannot be deceived or tampered with. It's our most powerful self defense weapon, our defense against the human liars of this world.

We don't need "evidence" in the only sense we're given to believe it exists, in courtrooms and from testimony and stuffed in little plastic bags. They control all of that. That's why they're still in charge. That system is set up to protect them and keep them from being prosecuted, not the other way around. It is always manipulated to their advantage, it is their tool. If we used our innate abilities to discern truth they couldn't even get away with that.

The only evidence that really matters is the kind we get from using our heads and allowing our receivers to get the unspoken truth from them, to receive their true intent and the true nature of their being which we can do, and it is absolutely accurate. But they tell us emphatically that can't be done and that anyone who thinks so is not credible, maybe not even sane. And nothing can be worse than being given the highest insult of all. That the very nature and purpose of our being, to take in and put out thought, is incapable of executing a legitimate process. What an insult. What scares us more than to be branded invalid as thinkers and discerners of reality? It's so ironic how truth is reversed and used to control us and allow them to stay in control by invalidating us. This is one of their most basic weapons. And with it they deceive the whole world.

I know we have the ability to receive their true thought objects and understand the truth of these people. I receive the truth and I know exactly who they are. I have always had strong T.O. receivers. They were strong even back in the days when I let the status quo opinion over ride my own direct experience. I can't understand now why I denied myself on the word of others back then, but at the time it felt normal. It no longer feels normal, to put it mildly. I don't care what anyone thinks, especially not what the status quo has to say on any subject. There's no worse opinion than the one everybody has, it's almost always wrong.

About ten years ago I decided to consciously take note of what my receivers brought in, sometimes it would be about things and often it was information about people. I could strongly sense people, sense them on the inside, as in being inside them myself. Not completely in there, but enough to get a really good sense of who they were. After keeping track of these feelings, in a very short time I proved to myself that they were spot on accurate time and time again. The feelings or thoughts about "stuff" were not accurate, they are not a part of this. That makes sense because things don't create thought objects, they're inanimate, they don't think. But what I got about people proved to be right on the nose. From that point forward I released the chains on this normal, natural thing inside me, and let my receiver do its thing. Ten years later I can trust it like a solid object. I can almost always tell instantly when somebody is lying. It's a very specific frequency that my gut receives, and it comes as a physical feeling. It's amazing how precise and sensitive this receiver is. You wouldn't believe the scope, variety or intensity of information I'm getting just by being in someone else's proximity.

There's nothing paranormal about this. It's not complicated or spooky or weird. We all do it all the time, but we toss out the information and don't understand that it's real. That it's another sense, another way of discerning reality which we need to know in order to function effectively in this world. It doesn't make sense that we can't defend ourselves against the most dangerous weapon that human beings create with their minds, lies. Of course we have the ability to defend ourselves from liars. Of course that defense has to be another function of the mind. It has to operate on the same level that lies are created on. Where else could it operate? It's within us. And it's the one thing they can't control. It is far more powerful than they are, and far more powerful than lies. We can walk away from this nonsense any time just by being who we really are.

The idea that thoughts are objects seems to answer my own questions about how I am able to get so much information about people. It also explains why this is not something I can do by choice or on demand. It's a receiver, it depends on what other people put out. Some people are really good at masking and some don't put out anything in particular to pick up on. But some people transmit what's inside them so intensely that it affects me physically.

This works over TV and radio too. It works when listening to recorded media. All the information is there. Thoughts are a part of the spoken word. They're recorded along with speech because they're a physical element of speech. They are there and they can be received just like the sound can be heard.

Because nature doesn't waste anything or do anything pointlessly, believing that we sense or pick up on things because we're stupid or crazy doesn't ring true. There's nothing crazy about this. It's simple stuff and it's natural. It's normal. We create thoughts and we broadcast them. Does it not stand to reason that we would also be able to receive them?

Just think what it would be like if we all knew we had this normal and natural sense and we learned to use it from childhood. What if we could always tell when politicians were lying their heads off to us? If we knew our gut feelings and other receiving senses are the real thing, we would trust what we pick up out there, and that would serve us very well. We could avoid so much crap and so much evil and keep it from ever happening.

We're being held back in too many ways by people whose beliefs are all messed up. We're living in a world stuck in the thought objects of people who are obsessed with lust for money and power; and that dark thought matter, I think, is like getting stuck in the La Brea tar pits. Their nasty ass dark matter thought objects gunk us up, which is why they want us sitting in front of our TV sets 24 hours a day. The whole world gets up every morning to chase the dollar and could there be a more stupid reason to do anything than that? That's not a reason to do anything. It doesn't deserve to be what motivates the planet above all else.

Too many people are still carrying forth thoughts from seriously backward times where the invisible realm was considered evil and demonic. They're making us blind ourselves and cripple ourselves with their messed up beliefs. There's nothing evil or demonic about knowing ourselves and realizing how much more we are capable of, how much more intake we can gather in order to output better thinking to benefit ourselves and others. Those sixth senses we keep hearing about aren't about seeing dead people. That's fine for Hollywood, but the sixth sense is nothing but a sensationalized phrase for a reality that is inherent in all of us by nature. Who knows what's possible with this, once we stop letting others define us and do that job ourselves. It is rather personal, who else's job should it be but our own?

Well, that's about it. This subject is a part of a bunch of things that came out of nowhere and dazzled my mind for an entire evening Wednesday night. Things were flowing, all kinds of things, it was really pretty cool. I just wanted to share this one and see what you thought of it. It seems like something interesting to think about because if thoughts really are things, then that could mean a heck of a lot in the real world we all live in.

5 comments:

  1. I'd be really interested in a description or example of how thought objects feel to you - or maybe how strong and weak signals differ. Also, are there any exercises or methods that have helped you to more clearly interpret the signals?

    Very interesting post as always.

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  2. Hi Leaf,

    Those are great questions, they're making me look at something I've never thought about.

    Let me try the second question first. Exercises or methods. The only method I ever used was at the start when I began testing myself. What it boils down to is being able to trust what you feel. In the very beginning I decided to just trust myself, knowing I would have to prove myself wrong at least some of the time. And if I was all wrong about all of this, I would prove that and answer the question once and for all. I knew it was real some of the time and went in expecting to be wrong some of the time too, that was the point of doing it in the first place, to tell what was what. I didn't think of it as a lack of capability, but a part of the process of learning how to tell the real experiences from something self generating. I just decided that since I kept having this experience, I wanted to know once and for all if it was the real thing or just my imagination. I was either going to respect it and use it in my life as a valid form of information receiving, or let it go and forget about it.

    To trust yourself you have to extend the trust. Then be conscious about it. The hardest part is realizing that this isn't hard. We never learn how to filter out the signals so we're virtually unaware of what's coming through. It never occurs to us that not every single thing we're sensing is self generated. It just requires paying attention and noticing what's coming through your own body and giving the process a chance to become something you can recognize. Accept whatever comes, don't judge it or fire up logical thinking to talk yourself out of it. Just acknowledge it and let it come and go. It pans out over time, sometimes immediately. I think the method of testing what you sense in order to realize just how valid it is, is absolutely necessary. In the beginning, you're not sure if what you're feeling is real or true because the feelings at that stage feel so subtle. They're there but they feel like everything else you feel in a day. The trick is in discerning them from your own feelings.

    I could suggest something to try. Take a half an hour or so when you can be alone before heading out somewhere that people will be. You can do this before going to the grocery store, or before a class, or to a restaurant, it doesn't really matter where you're headed as long as it's a calm enough place that you're not likely to be distracted or where you can't hear yourself think, or that you'll necessarily be engaging in conversation. Before heading out, take some time to become fully conscious of your own state of being. Get clear how you feel, what you feel like, what feels like you. What is your energy level. Are you in a good mood, a calm mood, are you irritable, are you feeling kind of goofy and light inside? Notice how you feel physically. Do you feel well? Do you feel tired? Is any part of your body sore? Do you have a headache? Are you hungry? When you know what you feel like, what feels like you, you've got something to compare it to. You'll be more able to notice then when all of a sudden you're thinking something that was not on your mind or feeling something that is not how you feel at that particular moment.

    When I'm doing something as ordinary as standing in line at the store, I can usually feel the people standing next to me at some level. Sometimes it's quite weak and other times intense. This speaks more to your first question as to what I feel. I pretty much feel anything anyone else can feel. I can feel someone's tiredness, their sadness, their relationship troubles. I pick up anxiety, tension, immaturity and self-centeredness. I can sense ego. Intention in a general sense like not okay or okay. A strong sense of an overall person is what I get most of all, but it can be something specific too. I can feel other people's fear and grief. Something I feel all the time is genuine warmth and kindness in people. I feel emptiness and disappointment too.

    If you do this with perfect strangers it might surprise you what kinds of feelings and thoughts are just inside your head all of a sudden and if you're paying attention you'll notice when it's something that isn't yours. It can sometimes help to look at the eyes, it's not necessary though. I can feel the inner thug of some people, mostly guys, but women can have some pretty nasty games running too. Sharper egos come through very clearly.

    The negative things, not sadness but failings, arrogance, dishonesty, evil intent, just a nasty coldness or maybe it's psychopathy, those kinds of things make me feel ill. As in turning my stomach. It's pretty hard to miss that, nausea is physical. But so is a sudden burst of energy and balance from someone having a wonderful life. If we could see thoughts and feelings I bet we'd be blown away realizing how we're emanating everything inside us, all along thinking it was hidden and private. Most of us aren't any good at hiding anything.

    The spectrum of what I pick up is too big to list but the important thing is, to just start doing it by letting yourself notice it. You're already doing it. The excerise isn't in developing it, but in recognizing it. It has to be conscious in the beginning because you don't know what it is yet, then after a while you don't have to think about it anymore. You just know. Further on down the road it does get stronger.

    I have even experienced other people's hunger pangs, and even specific cravings. I remember once just getting back from lunch at work and as I sat down I got this overwhelming urge for Cheetos. And I thought, what the heck? I just ate. I didn't want any Cheetos. The feeling was so strong I was almost ready to go get some when this lady sitting behind me stood up and put on her jacket and said she wanted some Cheetos so bad she would kill to get them. She had to get some right then, she couldn't wait anymore. Boy was I relieved, but it also was a confirmation that what I was feeling didn't fit what I was feeling. It was something from somebody else. And I didn't know that woman, she was visiting from another location. I was lucky she spoke up otherwise I'd never have known what was really happening.

    In essence, thought objects feel exactly like my own feelings. They're not any different quality than my own feelings or thoughts. but they are distinct from my own.

    The only thing I should add is that your own intent and frame of mind and your general attitude towards all kinds of people has to be - geez this sounds cliched but it's true - it has to be a loving attitude. You have to love and respect people and not want anything from them. I naturally care about people, a lot, I like people. I wish them all well. I want them to live happy lives and have all of their needs met. I think if I went in with an agenda of any kind, especially a selfish or bigoted one, if my intent was to hurt someone's feelings or cause them any kind of pain, I'm not sure if it would work. I'm glad to say I don't know. Maybe it's still possible but I can't help suspecting that someone's own darkness would make it hard if not impossible to sense anything from anyone. Maybe that's why I immediately sense salesmen, the ones that look at people like someone to victimize. That comes through so intensely it's not pretty. I don't like predators and I'm not shy about telling them where to go.

    I don't know if that helped explain it very well or not, I hope so. Thanks for being interested and for the questions.

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  3. Hi Ang,

    Thanks for this post. I used to read your blog from time to time, but started to feel like it was too negative, so I took a break from it. Recently I came across your podcast link on www.pbsblog.com.

    I listened to it, and was immediately drawn in. I have read your last five posts today.

    I heard the other day that sometimes when you have a hard time reading something, it has more to do with you not being ready for it, than the actual writing.

    I thank you for this.

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  4. Hi Know Nothing,

    Thanks for posting your comment. Don't feel alone about finding some of my posts too negative, I often feel the same way. I think that's important feedback because I am interested in writing about other things that speak to realities that are not depressing, such as this post. I'm glad you got a different feel from the audio stuff, it makes a difference how things are said, I think, and a lot can be conveyed with voice that can't be gotten across with written words. Thanks for mentioning that, the feedback is good to hear. I'm glad you came back for another try.

    Ang

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  5. I had it in mind to leave a comment, but when I saw your response to Leaf's comment, I forgot all about what I was going to say.

    I've had similar experiences, yet not nearly as defined as yours. Like sometimes when I'm at work, I'll feel a strange pressure in my inner ear seconds before I actually hear somebody walking down the tiled hallway floor, and sometimes be left with a headache after being near a certain person for too long. I do have a problem focusing, but your comment in response to Leaf's question is very helpful. I thank you both, I thought I was the only one.

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